Oh-My-Africa

Somehow my first Sunday morning in Kona. Waste deep in the warm, turquoise waters of Hapuna Beach. I found myself talking about Africa with my wonderful friend, Taren. About how I had no desire to go there. "Don't say that," she jestfully warned me. Assuring me that a statement like that would surely get me what I didn't want. As many before had utter similar phrases and found themselves in places, even nations they dreaded in their heart. Looking back on that it really is quite funny.

That next week a video was played, revealing the AWAKEN DTS' Outreach Locations names. For some, it fanned flames on places that were already burning in their hearts. For others, it failed to light to the altars they'd built. Then there were those of us caught in between. And I refused to go any further than what I felt God was presently revealing. That has been my journey with this whole YWAM thing all along. Current and relevant information is all that I want. So, I didn't wonder about locations before that day. Unnecessary. When I needed to know I would know. Today was that day.I saw was the word Cambodia, almost in 3D, hovering in front of the screen. Which took me back to the ocean. To Taren laughing at my naivety. I thought with an nervous certainty, "That's Africa." Names of these countries continued to appear. No intense passion or fear arose for any of them. Yet, I needed two to write down. Then it was announced that we could leave our slips of paper blank and have the staff pray about where to place us. That gave me a sense of peace. These men and women have been praying since before we set foot in this place, clearly their prayers are effective because we are here.

Funny thing, I sat there questioning my heart and petitioning God on what else I should put down. I felt like Mozambique was highlighted. India too. As I walked over to the world map, to find Cambodia. I mysteriously got it in my head that it was in Africa. So when I couldn't find it and was kindly directed to Asia, it was sweet relief, amusement and confusion. I decided to put both Mozambique (which is actually in Africa haha ) and India in my second slot for the staff to prayerfully consider.

Throughout the next week we waited for teams to be situated and revealed. I realize now all the hints God gave me. Thursday Night Gathering, we sat on this giant map of the world and listened to the speaker and afterwards we walked around on it interceding for the nations. I started in Russia, but at the end I was standing in front of Cambodia. The only other person next to me praying was one of the staff, Sarah. I fervantly tried to stay focused. The next day, I was eating lunch and my new friend Jon (who is a friend of our school) told me he woke up that morning with a need to pray for Cambodia. A lecturer and a worship leader seperately mentioned it as well. I reasoned it was nothing, because Mozambique had come up once or twice as well.

The day of reveal, I woke up thinking, "It would be weird if Taren was my one-on-one" (we have mentoring sessions with one of our team leaders for the rest of school and on outreach). But then quickly chose to wonder what location she'd probably be going apart from me. Monday Mystery Fun Night arrives and we all gather to our classrom, antsy and excited. Our staff and leaders have been going nuts for a while, blaring music, dancing, and shouting in anticipation themselves. There are sheets hanging on the stage, but before we could see what they concealed we are sent away to different parts of the campus. Girls seperated from guys. We are handed white evelopes with other girls names on them that we have to deliver. I finally receive mine and pull out a red and blue flag with a white castle on it. Assuming it is Cambodia, I search for other girls with my flag. The four of us find each other and follow the instructions on the back of our flag to the tree house where we meet our two male teammates. Next, we get all decked out in the colors represented on our flags and head back to the classroom where one by one each location's team was announced. Haha! Then we had a hot, sweaty mess of a dance party!

L-R: Sarah, Me, Lotte, Margaret, Taren, Alexandra, Jesse, Matt P. & Matt S.

I wish I could accurately describe how it felt to let myself go there and be excited. To remember all the little ways God HAD been speaking to me. To paint the picture of hope I finally had. I wish you could have seen my face when our leaders for burst out from behind those hanging sheets with face paints and war cries! When I saw my friend and it dawned on me how good my God is. He gave me a good gift, beyond what I was willing to ask or imagine up until the moments just before. I was going to Cambodia. I was going with Taren. And Sarah (who kind of gave herself away by adding me on Facebook the night before). And Matt Scap (who I introduced on this blog). God works in mysterious ways. Wow. We are going to Cambodia!!!!

C'mon InFusion!

Today, in our Thursday afternoon 1-3pm prayer set, we commissioned out the InFusion students here on the base. These wild 12-18 year olds have completed their two week coursework and depart tomorrow. We got the priviledge of praying for them and sending them out. Interceding on their behalf, for the worlds back home they are about to enter. For their game-changing spirits to shift the atmospheres they invade. I am so stoked that I got to personally pray for a group of six beautiful young woman. Almost immediately upon hearing that our prayer set for Arts and Entertainment would be delayed a week to honor what God had been doing and was continuing to do in these kids, I saw a picture of an aspen filled mountain being set ablaze. Tthe spark that started it all represented those young people. The fire that has been ignited in their hearts. I felt like God was giving the inspiration of Matthew 21:21,

"Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and it will be done."

Their setting these fires (at home and in school, in youth groups and communities, wherever really) with their own flame is going to engulf mountains that are then to be hurled into the sea of God's liiving water. Their light is meant to infuse life.

Tonight in the Ohana Court Gathering (basically the whole base gathers for a time of worship, prayer, guest speakers) two of the students that hours before we were worshipping with and fighting for in prayer, shared testimonies of their experiences. I was struck by their conviction and confidence. Also, their joy and humility. This (seemingly) little boy uttered wisdom grown men have yet to grasp. Bold leadership certainly had been loosed in him. Who of us at 13 understood and walked in the authority Christ? It was extremely cool to hear their stories and see the truth burning strong within them.

There's something about our generation. Specifically, the youngest among us. Those before us and even we ourselves were so suceptable to the emotional highs of camps and conferences. Prone to believing in an inaccurate picture of Jesus just because that's all we were given. But these, they see right through that. They won't surrender or sacrifice for a false Jesus. But give them the real deal, show them how to encounter His supreme love . . .and everything will come undone within them.

So, world hold on to your seatbelt, because they're coming for you!

Check this!

Orchestras & Symphonies

If I had to highlight one thing from this past week, it would without a doubt be community. This is a beautiful place. But it is a strange place. With peculiar people. At  least I think that's how it would seem outside looking in. Being inside and breathing out though, I would say they are no different than the 84 other students that arrived here last Thursday for the AWAKEN DTS. We are all hungry. They are just further along.

Hunger for the things of God. Hunger to know him more. Hunger to give up our lives for him (whatever that looks like for each of us). It is evident that we are all united in that or else we would not be here. I definitely would not. We all know that there is something inside us that is in desperate need of him. And we're going for it. This group of 17-20somethings from all over the U.S., some from Germany, Denmark, Brazil, and New Zealand among other places. From all walks of life. From YWAM kids born into missionary families to  people who chose to live for Jesus only two months ago. None of us perfect, but acting out of some stage of 'sweet brokenness.'

There is absolutely no way that I can describe my time here, this experience, this opportunity to run after God  . . .without introducing you to the students and staff who are running with me. All relying on God's provision and the support of others as we seek to increase our faith and found our feet on the rock that is Christ. Tonight, I must offer up our fearless leader Mr. Matt Scaparotti. Or at least a few of his words and musings about "orchestras and symphonies" from Monday's class. It has been impressed upon me the last couple days that God really did choose us (choose me) for this time. He knew that 1988 was the year I needed to be born to encounter all the people and situations that would shape my life to get me to this point. The same is true for my roommates and my fellow students and the staff too. He knew he wanted us to be here together. And it is important to understand that it would matter if even just one of us was missing. If one of us gave up or the support didn't make it through or someone decided it was too hard and left. It would matter.

An orchestra is a group of performers playing various instruments. A symphony is an elaborate composition, a harmony of sounds. Now, the composer chose every sound, wrote out each intricacy, played it out in his mind. From the flute to cello to the oboe and violin. And more! Anywhere from 40-100 instruments! That is a vision of the body of Christ. Of AWAKEN 2012. "For the song to be played, we all need to play are part," Matt said. What God has placed in each of us is needed for the whole. Are we are willing to step into that? I think so. But we need God to show us who we are even more fully to recognize and play our instruments well. With confidence. With full assurance. With 100 percent trust in him. 

So yeah, we're hungry. We're here to encounter God. To learn how to display the specific parts of his image that reside in us. To bring them forth and walk them out. This is the community I have been sent to. To run with in this season. This is my heart. To tell their stories. To tell our stories, to play my part. To fulfill this sweet song of glory. Together.

Blogging is a strange thing. It seems at times unnatural, but it can be cool. That is what I have learned in the two years since I tried to do this thing. And a lot has happened in two years. Enough to cause me to find this thing and try again. But this time not for myself. Not to just do it. But instead to obey, trust, and give back. It's funny to see my search for life in the four posts before. And to be living the fulfillment of those now as a day old student at the University of the Nations YWAM-Kona. Even the title, "Learning to Breathe: it's about the passions that we ache for" is so indicative of my heart then and how it has grown up to this point right now. So, it would probably be appropriate to change that too. Later. Soon.

Today, I am just reveling in the fact that running full speed after God is what I get to do for the next six months of my life!!! I am grateful more and more for the people who helped me get here. All the ones, who like me, heard God's voice and answered his call. That is what YWAM (Youth with a Mission) is all about. A generation. Of people. For generations. Of people. That want to hear God's voice and do what he asks them to do. No matter what. I am eager to see how God will honor the support of all those who have prayed and are praying back home. How he will multiply the generosity that has been poured out on me to the givers he raised up for this season's AWAKEN DTS. And how he will continue to come through for me (especially with the first outreach payment of $2500 due in August). For you, too!

 I am honored to have been chosen to go and am overjoyed to have finally made it here. It is a good Friday to say the least. And it's not even over yet. So, welcome! Here we go!!